This Show Was Brought To You By The Letter P

The Emeralds/Portugal Japan/Phenomenauts/Peelander-Z//Knitting Factory//11/5/05

Strange. A year to the day after I went to the Knit Main Space only because The Groovie Ghoulies were opening for El Vez I was back there, this time for a post- Halloween show. I figured that since this is the Knitting Factory and they had shows going on all day on all the floors, I could show up a little after 10 because we'd all be relegated to the Main Bar and made to wait until they open the magic doors. (I wonder if "Open Sesame" would help.) As I walked down W. Broadway, I worried. What if I got this all wrong? What if people have been lining up since 8 or 9? Then what? There's $10 I'll never see again. For some reason, even from a couple'a blox away, I could see the crowd gathered there. And I was right.

There's a mob scene in front of the place and people on line. When I got there I asked if that was the line for the late show and they said no. So I went inside to loiter. What the Knitting Factory loves, I know. I waited in the doorway of the Main Space Bar, getting nervous as lines of people went in and downstairs. The chalkboard listed yet another band--The Emeralds. Well, maybe the P is silent. Peelander on at 1:35 AM. Yay. Adults, the type without teens in tow, mill about as a woman with a trio of teens--2 in cat ears--come in to buy tix. Musicians and fans are coming in and out of the bar. The woman with the teens stands opposite the box office window. The guy doing the door keeps announcing that we have to keep the area clear for the musicians loading in and out. I stand in the doorway to the bar. Every time people come in, I get in line. And get sent back into the bar. I worry that the doors at the back of the bar are going to open up first. 5 mins, still soundchecking. I worry that I may be at the front of a teenage stampede.

Still, even though it's The Phenomenauts and Peelander, I shouldn't have gone because this is the Knit and they're stupid with these things. Maybe they shouldn't've had all these earlier shows going on if they can't handle the traffic. More people come inside and I come out and get in line. Sent back to the bar. So I stand in the hallway in front of the bar, looking at the teens, standing closer to the venue doors. Maybe my little antennae picked up on it, maybe it's just that I've been doing this longer, but when the guy in charge of opening the doors opened his mouth I shot over with my ticket in my hands as he said "If you've got a ticket for Phenomenauts...." I mean, think about it. The word "if" takes a lot of lung power and sounds longer, especially when you're yelling it. I'm the 1st one to give him my ticket and he says, "Thank you, baby. You're a good girl." I tell him that I try to be. Inside, the teens take out a digital camera and take pix of each other, the bar, and Peelander's drums. Then they take out a teeny little pad and start writing love notes to Peelander-Z, leaving them on the stage.

Kung-fu theme music plays as the first Emerald comes onstage, dressed in a sushi chef getup, bowing and posing. The other 2 come out, all in costume, and I'm like Not another gag band but they shed their jackets to reveal leather pants and near-identical shirts. Explosive is the only word I can think of to describe them. Blazing rock 'n' roll from Yokahama, Japan, that sounds bigger than the venue, if that makes any sense. Like, I can see/hear them in a huge concert hall. The r'n'r is a refreshing change over all the Japanese punk I've seen. Bonus points to the bass player who broke his wrist and had it bandaged up, along with his thumb. They each took turns introducing themselves, the bass player saying that even though he broke his wrist, they stayed on the tour because we want to hear Japanese rock 'n' roll.

Actually, it's The Portugal Japan, as their T-shirts say. Another trio from Japan, all female, but they play garage rock reminiscent of early Donnas. I guess they'd get Shonen Knife comparisons for being 3 Japanese chicks but better lyircal style. The guitar player had a Nikki Corvette shirt on and when she was checking, she had on pink, diamond-studded cat-eye glasses. The girls leave them notes that say Asian Hotties.

I don't know why the Phenomenauts don't headline more often. Rockabilly from outer space via California, complete with upright bass, cannon spraying foam, and a leaf blower with toilet paper on the end. I think they're bigger on the left coast then they are here, which should change. A girl with a studded face comes out of nowhere and stands behind me, in my space. She fumbles with her shoe, grabbing onto me to steady herself. She talks to her friends about how she wants drugs. All through the set she's trying to wedge herself next to me and I have to keep trying to keep her out. I swear, it was like I was a pinball flipper. If she wanted to stand up front that badly, she should've gotten there early. And she kept touching me, putting her hand onstage like that was giving her some footing. Though it was tempting I'm sure hitting her would still be wrong, even in this situation.

Peelander-Z checked and set up in their regular clothes for the longest and I was worried for a sec that they ditched the garb, but no, they were the usual manga maniacs. Peelander Yellow said that he'll show us his small asshole and then we'll show us our small assholes and then we'll be friends. When Pink broke out the tambourines and pots for the audience to play, there was pretty much a stampede. I already figured there was no way I was climbing on that stage, but then people who were clambering down felt that they were allowed to clutch my bad shoulder to steady themselves since I was right in front and they were all getting offstage to my left. It was the wildest Peelander show ever with mad shoving and pushing. Now my back is killing me from everyone piling up on top of me. The girl from Portugal Japan with the pink glasses played with them and did a stage dive. She's carried around and almost lands on my head but the crowd put her down. When they ended with their theme song, The Emeralds were back in their getups and they all danced around and it was great. I love Peelander because every time I see them they have new pins.

I took the 1 (or whatever was stopping @ Franklin at 2:30 AM) up to Times Square and even though I knew the E was running over the R line, I found myself wandering over to 8th Ave. These things always happen when I'm wandering around subway stations in the early AM after a show. I didn't get very far before I remembered and headed for the R. There were no signs that the E was stopping there (Wait, read that last bit again. Ha ha.) and I thought maybe the work was finished, even though the signs said Nov. 5-7. I didn't have the energy to walk all the way back but I didn't want to stand there for 45 mins to find out I'm in the wrong spot. So I asked a woman if she knew if the E was stopping there. She asks me where I'm trying to go and then she suggests taking the W and walking. Ya know, if the W were even an option for me we would not be having this conversation. So I asked another woman who said that she thinks the E is stopping there. "I hope." An MTA worker appears and someone is already asking him something, and all I hear is E and go downtown and back one stop to 34th for the F. What? A guy mutters that if they're making changes to the changes then they should inform us of said changes. But before I can find out what the worker is referring to something comes down the pike and lo & behold it's the E.