All Day Affair
All-Ages Matinee: Due Tomorrow/Bottle Rocket/The Delegates/The Killtakers//ABC No Rio
21+ Late Show: Leslie & The Lys/Peelander-Z/Satanicide//Mercury Lounge//12/3/05
Dear bands: I'm busy/poor/it's cold out, so please name yourselves properly or I won't go to the show. The Delegates are a "totally danceable reggae/punk explosion?" Well, I'm there. On the F down, a woman schleps through the car saying that she knows there's a lot of people asking for help around this time, but could we please spare something for her because she's in a shelter. She's carrying a Nat Sherman bag for donations. Jeez. Did she leave the Tiffany's bag back at the shelter? "Boy! I hope I don't get like you guys. Even I help the homeless!" Outside No Rio is a flyer that says they're thinking of upping the cover to $7 in January due to rising gas prices and they can better help the bands that way. Great. I can't pay the rent and won't be able to afford that many shows next year as it is. Still, it's only $1 more and 4 bands for $7 ain't all that bad. A guy came in and went up to the mic because he wanted to bust a rhyme. The volunteers told him they weren't turning them on yet, but he insisted. Then tried to sell us cell phones and knit hats. He came back to where I was sitting and said, "You're in light blue, this'll go perfectly!" and threw a hat at me. "$2!" he said, oblivous to the fact I was already wearing a hat. "C'mon! Just give me a dollar! I'll get outta here for $1!" Nobody was biting, so he went to leave, trying to bust a rhyme one last time. "C'mon! I'm a crook from Brooklyn! Let me bust a rhyme!" The volunteers told him that poetry was on Monday and to come back then. "Whaddaya have today? Rock bands?" They said yes and the crook from Brooklyn looked up said, "Hey, your ceiling's coming down! When I get back later, all that shit better be down!"
Due Tomorrow is not emo/screamo, which is what I was expecting. They are, however, a bunch of yungins, which is what I was expecting. They looked to be about 15-17. Anyhoo, props for the instro numbers and not writing/playing music in a certain way because they think they have to. Maybe I'm not explaining it right, maybe it's because I see too many young bands mining a certain sound because they think it'll help them be taken seriously. Bottlrocket is from LI/Bklyn and they have shared vocals, but the guitar player kept screaming even though their poppy sound didn't call for it. The other guitar player had an Alkaline Trio patch on his guitar strap, so I guess they're influenced by AT. I'm too old for AT, but I'm guessin' they have a similar style to Bottlerocket. As would Against Me! The Delegates of course were cool--how could they not be--but it was freezing and they asked us all to huddle close to them so we could all be warm. Which left very little room for dancing but at least I wasn't standing right in front of the 2 trombone players or I might've gotten a slide to the mouth. And it was too small a space for a 6-piece band who would probably tear the place up if they had the space. And if they weren't in a place that was already falling down. Also fun was their cover of The Final Countdown. They played on the 5th but I had another show. Dammit! The Killtakers. Sigh. Young and sporting fresh tatoos, they were a bit too mall-y and suburban for me. They seemed so eager to please and it came across in their sound, as well. It's like watching the popular kids' band. Watching them and listening to them, I thougt of high school seniors who ruled the roost and had a smug, cocky attitude because of their newfound social standing. Like they're owed something.
So then it was back on the F home because I didn't bring the Merc ticket with me. I probably shoulda because the early show got out at a little after 7 and it was a tight squeeze and then turning right back around and going back to the same area I just left. But the 1st band wasn't going on till 9:30 and besides, Satanicide's crew never gets there til Satanicide goes on. So doors were probably 8:30 and then some. Then again, if I had the ticket on me I would've stayed at Kinko's spending money to type this. Well, at least I would've been getting it done. Back home, fed the cat, picked up the ticket, back on the F train.
I totally forgot that it was Black 47's birthday. Their Sweet 16, in fact. I should've remembered that, of course, but when I saw Satanicide's show listed I ran down and bought the ticket the day it went on sale. Of course I should've remembered this because I missed their 15th Anniversary gig last year on December 4 because I was at Siberia for The Spunk Lads. In the long run it doesn't matter, even though that wasn't one of my favorite Lads shows. Thing is, I've put up with a lot from them and I love them to pieces, but now I've got a serious problem. They're on Myspace--but that's not the problem. Fine, people/bands like doing that sorta thing so who am I to complain, but it's their list of influences that's the problem. The first band listed? The Darkness. The Darkness? Influences. Not "Bands we like" or "Bands that have songs we like." Influences. Second is Joe Strummer, but The Clash isn't mentioned. The Darkness is listed before Joe Strummer. Not on the list is Stiff Little Fingers, Springsteen, Dylan, Bob Marley. No Boomtown Rats. The Darkness is 1st. Are they trying to skew it young for the Myspace cadets? How can a 16-yr-old band be influenced by The Darkness? That's like listing The Strokes as an influence because they're a rock band and so is Black 47. No Major Thinkers, even though Black 47's classified as Rock/New Wave. The Darkness. I mean, if it weren't for Black 47 I never would've seen Seanchai, The Devil's Advocates, or Mary Prankster, to name just a few. I have standards, here. They should, too. Besides, songs about Heathers will always trump songs about Bridies.
The ticket said 8:30; doors at 8, but I knew that wasn't the case and even if it were, the 1st band was on at 9:30. And I saw Leslie & the Lys w/Satanicide in July and I wouldn't be crying my eyes out if I missed them, but what if Peelander's crowd was there early? I got down there a little after 9 and there was nobody there, just people sitting down on the couches drinking, which is what I'd expected, so I picked up a paper to read to pass the time. Yeah, Leslie & the Lys, Peelander-Z, and Satanicide. What a triple threat. Too bad the Culotteless Ones couldn't get on the bill. That woulda killed.
I don't know how/why Satanicide managed to hook up--uh, share bills with--Leslie & the Lys. I reviewed 'em back in July but never posted it because I was in my new-to-blogging, must do everything right phase and that was a long-ass post filled with my trademark boring backstories. Maybe I'll break up the post and review the bands separately. Because there's basically 2 ways to know if your band's schtick ain't working. 1) I'll tell you 2) People continue to laugh thru your set. Leslie is a 200-lb. gal in a gold spandex bodysuit, a headset, blue-green eyeshadow, and ugly, oversize, men's eyeglass frames. Her fake backup band consists of 2 gals in fake bling, light-up heels, headphones, and lime green spandex capris. One wears a "turntable" like a cigarette girl's tray, one has a toy "keytar"--a big keyboard with a fake fret. This time around in the smaller venue, I heard her tapping the plastic keys and no sounds coming out. The whack dance beats and "videos" from a pink Hello Kitty DVD player comes off as Le Tigre meets the Teletubbies. When Leslie's not singing about shooting zombies in the head, she "raps" about her first loves--gold spandex pants and appliqued sweaters. As if a woman who looks to be about 5 mos. pregnant and wrapped in gold spandex with some sort of space-age shoulder pads/breastplate on top isn't bad enough, she pays homage to tacky "gem sweaters" and calls people onstage to show off their gem sweaters. Leslie blesses them and gives them a name, then signs a certificate for her online museum. The problem with this, aside from the obvious, is that on Saturday she had about 6 gay guys taking the bait. She contacted Bedazzler to see if they'd sponsor the band and they turned her down. Now if Bedazzler doesn't want anything to do with this, you know it's gotta be bad/embarrassing. Cringeworthy.
I'm starting to think that being up front for Peelander-Z isn't the wisest thing to do because slamdancing breaks out, in addition to Peelander Yellow turning himself into a human bowling ball. It's good for being pulled onstage to play tambourine, which is what happened, but about 5 guys started running into each other and flinging each other about. It only stopped when the band went to pull audience members up to take over. All of a sudden, everyone stopped the mosh. They were like children waiting for a toy, I swear.
Alistair Cradley said that the audience looked like a bunch of homos--I guess he'd know. And Devlin's 2 fave food groups are Pussy & Ice Cream and smoking takes a year off your life but playing Dungeons & Dragons adds 7 years to your virginity, so perhaps the 40-Yr-Old Virgin played with a 20-Sided Die back in the 80s while cranking Satanicide. Devlin caught Alistair jerking off to the picture of a missing child on a milk carton because he thought it was a girl yet again. Again, Alistair was just partying. Satanicide rokked so hard that Devlin's wig fell off--one of the earliest times I saw them, the bandana fell out one of their pantlegs--probably because Baron Klaus von Goaten was back from making poo films in Norway, Germany and bringing that black metal sound showcased in his signature song Betrunken. Their ode to whores went out to the girl who slept with every band but won't sleep with them. Perhaps after Heather becomes a hit, Devlin guesses. After their set some geeky bald guy comes onstage to play guitar and jam with them. He says he's been a fan ever since he saw them at the Meadowlands in 86. He looked like a little idiot, the type of guy who drinks designer teas, but Alistair was his inspiration for picking up a guitar. "Look up hubris in the dictionary and there's a picture me onstage, with my idol Alistair." They traded solos, rokked Rebel Yell with Devlin reading lyrics. Guy calls himself Moby. Whatta rockstar, only going by one name. Yeah, Devlin was brought up on charges of fucking a dead whore in New Orleans but the charges were lowered to breaking and entering--even then it wasn't that bad seeing as how she was already broken when he got there. They closed with the original version of Titanic, a song about going down on a big vessel which some Canadian chick--speaking of broken-- covered and renamed My Heart Will Go On.
***
Post #70! Yeah, Mary Prankster got #69, not Satanicide. 70 posts, probably 2 readers, only 1 real comment! Woo! I'm doing good here. My goal for next year is to try to do those expandable post summaries again. Or delete the blog. Not sure which yet.
21+ Late Show: Leslie & The Lys/Peelander-Z/Satanicide//Mercury Lounge//12/3/05
Dear bands: I'm busy/poor/it's cold out, so please name yourselves properly or I won't go to the show. The Delegates are a "totally danceable reggae/punk explosion?" Well, I'm there. On the F down, a woman schleps through the car saying that she knows there's a lot of people asking for help around this time, but could we please spare something for her because she's in a shelter. She's carrying a Nat Sherman bag for donations. Jeez. Did she leave the Tiffany's bag back at the shelter? "Boy! I hope I don't get like you guys. Even I help the homeless!" Outside No Rio is a flyer that says they're thinking of upping the cover to $7 in January due to rising gas prices and they can better help the bands that way. Great. I can't pay the rent and won't be able to afford that many shows next year as it is. Still, it's only $1 more and 4 bands for $7 ain't all that bad. A guy came in and went up to the mic because he wanted to bust a rhyme. The volunteers told him they weren't turning them on yet, but he insisted. Then tried to sell us cell phones and knit hats. He came back to where I was sitting and said, "You're in light blue, this'll go perfectly!" and threw a hat at me. "$2!" he said, oblivous to the fact I was already wearing a hat. "C'mon! Just give me a dollar! I'll get outta here for $1!" Nobody was biting, so he went to leave, trying to bust a rhyme one last time. "C'mon! I'm a crook from Brooklyn! Let me bust a rhyme!" The volunteers told him that poetry was on Monday and to come back then. "Whaddaya have today? Rock bands?" They said yes and the crook from Brooklyn looked up said, "Hey, your ceiling's coming down! When I get back later, all that shit better be down!"
Due Tomorrow is not emo/screamo, which is what I was expecting. They are, however, a bunch of yungins, which is what I was expecting. They looked to be about 15-17. Anyhoo, props for the instro numbers and not writing/playing music in a certain way because they think they have to. Maybe I'm not explaining it right, maybe it's because I see too many young bands mining a certain sound because they think it'll help them be taken seriously. Bottlrocket is from LI/Bklyn and they have shared vocals, but the guitar player kept screaming even though their poppy sound didn't call for it. The other guitar player had an Alkaline Trio patch on his guitar strap, so I guess they're influenced by AT. I'm too old for AT, but I'm guessin' they have a similar style to Bottlerocket. As would Against Me! The Delegates of course were cool--how could they not be--but it was freezing and they asked us all to huddle close to them so we could all be warm. Which left very little room for dancing but at least I wasn't standing right in front of the 2 trombone players or I might've gotten a slide to the mouth. And it was too small a space for a 6-piece band who would probably tear the place up if they had the space. And if they weren't in a place that was already falling down. Also fun was their cover of The Final Countdown. They played on the 5th but I had another show. Dammit! The Killtakers. Sigh. Young and sporting fresh tatoos, they were a bit too mall-y and suburban for me. They seemed so eager to please and it came across in their sound, as well. It's like watching the popular kids' band. Watching them and listening to them, I thougt of high school seniors who ruled the roost and had a smug, cocky attitude because of their newfound social standing. Like they're owed something.
So then it was back on the F home because I didn't bring the Merc ticket with me. I probably shoulda because the early show got out at a little after 7 and it was a tight squeeze and then turning right back around and going back to the same area I just left. But the 1st band wasn't going on till 9:30 and besides, Satanicide's crew never gets there til Satanicide goes on. So doors were probably 8:30 and then some. Then again, if I had the ticket on me I would've stayed at Kinko's spending money to type this. Well, at least I would've been getting it done. Back home, fed the cat, picked up the ticket, back on the F train.
I totally forgot that it was Black 47's birthday. Their Sweet 16, in fact. I should've remembered that, of course, but when I saw Satanicide's show listed I ran down and bought the ticket the day it went on sale. Of course I should've remembered this because I missed their 15th Anniversary gig last year on December 4 because I was at Siberia for The Spunk Lads. In the long run it doesn't matter, even though that wasn't one of my favorite Lads shows. Thing is, I've put up with a lot from them and I love them to pieces, but now I've got a serious problem. They're on Myspace--but that's not the problem. Fine, people/bands like doing that sorta thing so who am I to complain, but it's their list of influences that's the problem. The first band listed? The Darkness. The Darkness? Influences. Not "Bands we like" or "Bands that have songs we like." Influences. Second is Joe Strummer, but The Clash isn't mentioned. The Darkness is listed before Joe Strummer. Not on the list is Stiff Little Fingers, Springsteen, Dylan, Bob Marley. No Boomtown Rats. The Darkness is 1st. Are they trying to skew it young for the Myspace cadets? How can a 16-yr-old band be influenced by The Darkness? That's like listing The Strokes as an influence because they're a rock band and so is Black 47. No Major Thinkers, even though Black 47's classified as Rock/New Wave. The Darkness. I mean, if it weren't for Black 47 I never would've seen Seanchai, The Devil's Advocates, or Mary Prankster, to name just a few. I have standards, here. They should, too. Besides, songs about Heathers will always trump songs about Bridies.
The ticket said 8:30; doors at 8, but I knew that wasn't the case and even if it were, the 1st band was on at 9:30. And I saw Leslie & the Lys w/Satanicide in July and I wouldn't be crying my eyes out if I missed them, but what if Peelander's crowd was there early? I got down there a little after 9 and there was nobody there, just people sitting down on the couches drinking, which is what I'd expected, so I picked up a paper to read to pass the time. Yeah, Leslie & the Lys, Peelander-Z, and Satanicide. What a triple threat. Too bad the Culotteless Ones couldn't get on the bill. That woulda killed.
I don't know how/why Satanicide managed to hook up--uh, share bills with--Leslie & the Lys. I reviewed 'em back in July but never posted it because I was in my new-to-blogging, must do everything right phase and that was a long-ass post filled with my trademark boring backstories. Maybe I'll break up the post and review the bands separately. Because there's basically 2 ways to know if your band's schtick ain't working. 1) I'll tell you 2) People continue to laugh thru your set. Leslie is a 200-lb. gal in a gold spandex bodysuit, a headset, blue-green eyeshadow, and ugly, oversize, men's eyeglass frames. Her fake backup band consists of 2 gals in fake bling, light-up heels, headphones, and lime green spandex capris. One wears a "turntable" like a cigarette girl's tray, one has a toy "keytar"--a big keyboard with a fake fret. This time around in the smaller venue, I heard her tapping the plastic keys and no sounds coming out. The whack dance beats and "videos" from a pink Hello Kitty DVD player comes off as Le Tigre meets the Teletubbies. When Leslie's not singing about shooting zombies in the head, she "raps" about her first loves--gold spandex pants and appliqued sweaters. As if a woman who looks to be about 5 mos. pregnant and wrapped in gold spandex with some sort of space-age shoulder pads/breastplate on top isn't bad enough, she pays homage to tacky "gem sweaters" and calls people onstage to show off their gem sweaters. Leslie blesses them and gives them a name, then signs a certificate for her online museum. The problem with this, aside from the obvious, is that on Saturday she had about 6 gay guys taking the bait. She contacted Bedazzler to see if they'd sponsor the band and they turned her down. Now if Bedazzler doesn't want anything to do with this, you know it's gotta be bad/embarrassing. Cringeworthy.
I'm starting to think that being up front for Peelander-Z isn't the wisest thing to do because slamdancing breaks out, in addition to Peelander Yellow turning himself into a human bowling ball. It's good for being pulled onstage to play tambourine, which is what happened, but about 5 guys started running into each other and flinging each other about. It only stopped when the band went to pull audience members up to take over. All of a sudden, everyone stopped the mosh. They were like children waiting for a toy, I swear.
Alistair Cradley said that the audience looked like a bunch of homos--I guess he'd know. And Devlin's 2 fave food groups are Pussy & Ice Cream and smoking takes a year off your life but playing Dungeons & Dragons adds 7 years to your virginity, so perhaps the 40-Yr-Old Virgin played with a 20-Sided Die back in the 80s while cranking Satanicide. Devlin caught Alistair jerking off to the picture of a missing child on a milk carton because he thought it was a girl yet again. Again, Alistair was just partying. Satanicide rokked so hard that Devlin's wig fell off--one of the earliest times I saw them, the bandana fell out one of their pantlegs--probably because Baron Klaus von Goaten was back from making poo films in Norway, Germany and bringing that black metal sound showcased in his signature song Betrunken. Their ode to whores went out to the girl who slept with every band but won't sleep with them. Perhaps after Heather becomes a hit, Devlin guesses. After their set some geeky bald guy comes onstage to play guitar and jam with them. He says he's been a fan ever since he saw them at the Meadowlands in 86. He looked like a little idiot, the type of guy who drinks designer teas, but Alistair was his inspiration for picking up a guitar. "Look up hubris in the dictionary and there's a picture me onstage, with my idol Alistair." They traded solos, rokked Rebel Yell with Devlin reading lyrics. Guy calls himself Moby. Whatta rockstar, only going by one name. Yeah, Devlin was brought up on charges of fucking a dead whore in New Orleans but the charges were lowered to breaking and entering--even then it wasn't that bad seeing as how she was already broken when he got there. They closed with the original version of Titanic, a song about going down on a big vessel which some Canadian chick--speaking of broken-- covered and renamed My Heart Will Go On.
***
Post #70! Yeah, Mary Prankster got #69, not Satanicide. 70 posts, probably 2 readers, only 1 real comment! Woo! I'm doing good here. My goal for next year is to try to do those expandable post summaries again. Or delete the blog. Not sure which yet.
posted by heather @ 11:27 PM
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